¥Is playing videogames really that difficult? I mean, all you have to do is press some buttons! Those 'videogame tournament champions' are bragging about an idiotic accomplishment, if you can really call something like that an accomplishment in the first place!¥, said 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́, after hearing about a videogame tournament, where the champions were being congratulated by the organizers for what he thought was a meaningless accomplishment, and he thought playing videogames was not very difficult, especially single-player games. 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ played videogames a few times in his life, with some old consoles. He played some easy games that didn't require a lot of skills, and he thought all games were like that. He generalized it as 'pressing some buttons to win', but he never played one of those more difficult games, so Marialisa was about to explain it more clearly to him.
$Listen, 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́, it's different from what you think$, explained Marialisa, $it actually takes a lot of skills to play videogames successfully! For example, in fighting games, there can be two players fighting against each other, and the mechanics are complex, it's not just a matter of 'pressing buttons', you need practice, experience, and skills$, she said. Marialisa loves playing videogames, she has some consoles, both old and new ones, and she also keeps herself informed about the new technologies that come up every year, for example she has a computer connected to the Internet, with the latest operating system 'Doors 98', which features several improvements compared to the predecessor 'Doors 95'. She has always been fascinated by videogames and technology.
¥Yeah fine. If two people are playing against each other, of course one of them wins, and that would be the most skilled. But in those games where you play alone, by yourself... I mean... you know what I'm talking about... those games require no skills! I'm pretty sure I would always win!¥, stated 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ , remembering how easy the games he played were, and assuming every single-player game was the same as those.
$Ha! Have you ever played any videogame in your life?$, asked Marialisa, giggling and feeling curious, thinking that perhaps, 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ had that attitude because maybe he never played videogames.
¥Of course!¥, said 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́, ¥I played ©ðŸ„¯©ðŸ„¯!¥, he explained. Marialisa then understood what was going on.
$©ðŸ„¯©ðŸ„¯?$, Marialisa laughed, $that game is for children! It's so easy! Of course you won all the time! If you played a serious game, like... like... Hyper Giuseppina 69, for example, I bet you would change your mind!$, said Marialisa, confident, $I have a knee-sex-doh 69 at my house, so you have that opportunity!$, she said, with a challenging smirk, wondering whether 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ would accept the challenge. To her surprise, he did.
¥Okay!¥, said 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́, accepting Marialisa's challenge, ¥But, what do I get if I prove myself right?¥, he asked, wondering if there was something more to the challenge than mere entertainment (he was okay with either scenario, in any case).
$Uh? Do you want it to be some gambling thing?$, asked Marialisa, a little bit confused, but she didn't mind if that's what 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ wanted, she was willing to satisfy his request in that case.
¥If you don't mind!¥, said 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́, interested in what kind of rewards and losses Marialisa could come up with.
$Okay then! Listen to the rules carefully!$, said Marialisa, about to explain. 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ was all ears, very focused, $You will come at my house to play Hyper Giuseppina 64, which is a game where you have to engage in missions and quests, if you win you will collect a planet in the game. To finish the game, you have to collect all 666 planets, but that's not the point of the challenge, since it would take a very long time. What you will do, instead, is participate in one quest in the game, if you win, I will give you three Drachmas$, 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́'s ears were aroused by the chance of receiving money, $Then, I will ask you if you want to play again. You can accept or refuse. If you refuse, you come home with three Drachmas. If you accept, you'll play again with a different mission, and if you win that one, you will get six Drachmas, and if you win the third one, you will get nine Drachmas and so on. If you lose...$, 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ was listening very carefully, $...if you lose, you will have to give me double the amount of what you would had won, so, if you lose the first mission, you'll give me six Drachmas, if you lose the second mission, you'll give me twelve Drachmas, if you lose the third mission, you'll give me eighteen Drachmas, and so on. Not only that, there's also another penalty if you lose...$, said Marialisa, $...if you lose, you will also have to let me fart on your face, as many farts as I can release in three hours, and you can never refuse$, she explained, $do you accept the challenge?$, she asked.
0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ was feeling a little bit anxious, however. Because, he has smelled Marialisa's farts a few times before in his life, so he knew how bad they smelled. Still, he wanted to prove her that he could win videogames easily, so he accepted, ¥Yes, I accept the challenge. I have 1,000 Drachmas with me, so I assume the maximum I can win is... uhm...¥, he did a quick calculation with his mind, ¥498 Drachmas, if I happen to win 166 times¥, he said.
$Sounds right$, said Marialisa, $let's walk to my house$
0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ and Marialisa walked through the streets, destination: Marialisa's house. It was a warm (24 °C, 75 °F, 297 K) sunny summer afternoon, it was school holiday season so 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́, Marialisa and other students were feeling happy and light-hearted. While they were walking, they saw a pterodactylus flying through the skies.
¥Look at that! I thought dinosaurs went extinct¥, said 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́, pointing at the pterodactylus, feeling confused. $Not all of them went extinct, some species have survived through these days$, explained Marialisa.
When they finally arrived at Marialisa's house, she explained the challenge to her parents, and 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ was quite embarassed, especially because of the part that involved smelling Marialisa's farts.
}M̄ār̄īāl̄īs̄ā ēx̄p̄l̄āīn̄ēd̄ t̄h̄ē
r̄ūl̄̄̄ēs̄ ōf̄ t̄h̄ē
c̄h̄āl̄l̄ēn̄ḡē t̄ō h̄ēr̄
p̄ār̄ēn̄t̄s̄ ān̄d̄ ās̄k̄ēd̄
0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ t̄ō s̄īḡn̄
t̄h̄ē c̄h̄āl̄l̄ēn̄ḡē c̄ōn̄t̄r̄āc̄t̄{̄
$Verba volant, scripta manent$, she said, indicating that words fly, but writings stay, $once you accept, if you violate the terms of the contract, I can sue you as well$, she reminded him, asking him if he was really sure he wanted to accept. He accepted and signed the contract, ready to participate in the challenge, $let's go to my bedroom, then$, she said. 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ and Marialisa went to her bedroom and were ready to start the
challenge. ¥Wow, you have your own computer!¥, said 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́,
surprised. $You don't?$, asked Marialisa,
giggling. ¥No, my mother has a computer for work. She writes and prints documents for the most part, and has a program about statistics. I don't know exactly. But it's not connected to the Internet. Yours is?¥, asked 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́,
curious. $Yes, I do have the Internet!$, said Marialisa, bragging about
it. ¥Wow! That's awesome! Can I try it?¥, he
asked. $Okay, I'll let you try it for a bit, but hurry up because we have to play our challenge, remember?$, she
reminded. ¥Okay, okay! Just a little bit, please, let me try it, I'm so curious, I have never tried the Internet before!¥, he said, feeling curious about the
Internet. $I'll turn my computer on$, she said, and 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ could see that the operating system of Marialisa's computer was Doors 98, the latest operating system released by Megahard, while his parents' computer still had Doors 95. 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ was feeling curious and wanted to try the Internet, he wasn't too sure about what to
expect. $The Internet is just a collection of pages that you can access if you know their URL, their address, which you type in the address bar of the browser, and then the page loads on your screen$, Marialisa
explained. ¥Whoa, you're going too fast!¥, said 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́, ¥I have never used the Internet before, so you'll have to explain it to me like I'm five¥, said 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́, ¥What is a browser, for example?¥, he
asked. $A browser is just a program that allows you to access the Internet. The most popular one is the NEFOSE Browser, and we're going to use that$, she
explained. ¥NEFOSE? Is that an acronym?¥, 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ asked,
curious. $Yes, NEFOSE stands for No Escape From Our Surveillant Eyes$, Marialisa explained. Her explanation made 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ a little bit
¿
distressed. ¥Wait! Is that name a joke, or does the browser actually spy on us?¥, he asked, starting to feeling even more
distressed.
distressed. $Well, the browser does collect your data, as well as the websites you visit. Everything you do on the Internet is recorded. That's normal$, explained Marialisa, feeling calm, and taking that fact for granted, as if it was nothing to worry
distressed.
about. ¥Marialisa! That's actually really disturbing!¥, 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ said, wondering why Marialisa wasn't feeling
distressed.
distressed. $Well, you better get used to it, 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́, I have a really strong feeling that in 20 years from now, the Internet will become so popular, everyone will use it, and be constantly surveilled, and people will not feel worried about it, they'll just take it for granted, as a perfectly normal part of their daily lives$, she explained. 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ found that possible future scenario extremely
disturbing.
disturbing. ¥I hope you're wrong about it!¥, 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ said, not wanting to live in such a
d̲i̲s̲t̲u̲r̲b̲i̲n̲g̲.
society. $I also hope I'm wrong, but I don't think I am. Well, we will see it in 20 years, with our own eyes, there's no need to worry about it right now$, she
said. ¥How do you get the name of a website?¥, 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́
wondered. $Well, you need to know the name of the website already. But, don't worry, I know a website that contains a list of thousands different websites! The website is called Coco Muerto. Here, sit in this chair, I'll let you type it by yourself. You need to type the address in the address bar at the top$, Marialisa explained, pointing at the address
bar. ¥What is the address of Coco Muerto?¥, 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́
asked. $You need to type www, first of all$, she
explained. ¥Okay, three w's, then. Uh... w... where is the w in this keyboard? ... Is there even a w in this keyboard?¥, he asked, not used to using a computer
keyboard. $Oh, you're not used to typing with a computer keyboard, I get it. Well, nevermind, I'll type the address for you$, she said, typing the
address. ¥Whoa! You type so fast! Incredible!¥, 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ said, shocked by that
speed. $Here it is! Thousands of websites listed in this website! You have to click on a link - which is basically a blue text that brings you to a different website. Here, for example, a weather website!$, said Marialisa, clicking on a weather
website. $I hope you're satisfied for today, because we have to do the challenge, remember? I'll turn my knee-sex-doh 69 on. We will play Hyper Giuseppina 69. I hope you're ready!$, said
Marialisa.
{IT'S ME, GIUSEPPINA}, said the main character of the game in the introductory menu, as Marialisa turned her gaming console on.
$Are you sure you want to play?$, asked Marialisa, $you can still change your mind if you want$
¥I'm sure! Let's play¥, said 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́, and Marialisa gave him the controller. The first level was an introduction to the game, a sort of tutorial, so it was going to be easier than the following levels. Giuseppina was in space, and she was driving a spaceship. The goal was to reach the first planet of the game without crashing into a meteorite, or without getting attacked by cosmic biological horrors that lived in the empty interplanetary space. 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ managed to win, and Marialisa let him know that was just a tutorial, to learn how to play the game, and some of the early game mechanics.
¥Well, does it matter? I won! Put the three Drachmas on the table, you promised it¥, said 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́, feeling the energy and feeling like he could win all levels of the game easily.
$Of course. Here are three Drachmas$, she said, putting the coins on the table, $well... not that you can do much with that money anyway, you can't even buy one candy with three Drachmas, haha! Do you want to continue, or do you want to end the challenge and win only three Drachmas?$, she asked, and 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ wanted to continue, $Okay, then! Now that you have collected one planet, the first true level of the game begins!$
The first planet of the game was very similar to the planet 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ and Marialisa live. Green grass, flourishing vegetation, houses, civilizations, trees, a bright blue sky, and people. The goal of that first planet was to hunt the Krostoth, a huge beast that is in danger of extinction on that planet and protected by all governments and wildlife protection agencies of that planet. The goal is to hunt and kill it without being caught by the police, take its precious meat, enter Giuseppina's spaceship, avoid the space police, and stealthily reach the second planet of the game, where another quest will take place. 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ managed to win, but it was not as easy as the tutorial. He thought that if the game was always going to have this difficulty, he could win any level he wanted to, without ever losing.
¥I want to continue!¥, said 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́, feeling determined.
The goal of the second planet was to sell the meat of the Krostoth to the hungry pirates, while being very careful not to be caught by the police, or by being deceived by a police officer that dressed like a pirate to deceive the player. It was an icy planet with yellow skies, full of volcanoes and dangerous grocery stores that sometimes kill customers randomly with a laser for no valid reason. At the beginning, 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ was doing well on the second planet, he almost sold all the meat of the Krostoth, but at the end, he accidentally sold some of the meat to a police officer who pretended to be a pirate, and so Giuseppina got arrested. Unfortunately, since Giuseppina was wearing a yellow t-shirt, which is considered offensive and disrespectful for the mainstream culture of that planet (especially among police officers, high social classes, and the kings and queens), Giuseppina received a fine, and she lost half of the money she gained by selling the Krostoth meat.
YOU LOST.
-CONTINUE
-QUIT
$You lost, 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́. Now you have to give me eighteen Drachmas, and you have to let me fart on your face for three hours$, said Marialisa, with a mischievous smirk on her face. 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ was feeling shocked that he lost, but a contract is a contract, so he gave Marialisa 18 Drachmas and lied down on her bed, so that she could fart on his face, ready to breathe the nauseating putrid stench in, $I'm glad you lost, I was starting to have a stomach ache from all the gas I've been holding in for hours! This morning I ate pizza, kebab, and spicy ramen, so my farts are gonna smell really bad~get ready to sniff!$, Marialisa said, sitting on 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́'s face, making sure that his nose was right between her asscheecks, so that he could smell her farts in the stinkiest way possible, $Get ready~nnnggghhh...$
€PPPBBBRRRFFFTTT€
As Marialisa's stinky fart hit 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ with massive heat and stench, burning his nose and making him gag from the stench, 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ was trying to break free, because the stench was unbearable, especially considering all the stuff Marialisa ate that morning, which she wasn't supposed to eat (because of how gassy she would be afterwards), and she wasn't even planning to fart on anyone's face, but 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́'s gambling tendencies gave her this great idea. $Don't struggle like that, 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́, you know you have to smell my farts, it's in the contract! I can put you into serious trouble if you violate the contract, you know? So, keep sniffing my smelly gas, I have lots more for you, enjoy the moment, seize the day, CARPE DIEM! Here's one more~nnnggghhh...$
£PPPBBBRRRFFFTTTSSSFFF£
$Aaahhh~how does that smell~hehehe~$, she said, as she was wafting her own fart away from her. The polluted smelly air was spreading not just on 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́'s nose and face, but that stinky air was also rising up and reaching Marialisa as well. $I can still smell my fart, you're not doing a great job at sniffing, are you? HAHAHA!!!$, she said, her laughter was starting to become a little bit creepy. 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ felt like his nose was melting from the intense stench and heat of Marialisa's flatulence, so he was begging her to let him breathe some fresh air, at least for a few minutes.
$HAHAHA!!! WHAT?!? You're supposed to smell the gas that comes out of my ass, not fresh air! SI VIS PACEM, PARA BELLUM!$, Marialisa said, suggesting 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ that if he wanted peace, he had to prepare for war, $And speaking of war, I'm gonna unleash some right on your nose~nnnngggghhhh....$
złPPPPBBBBRRRRTTTTSSSSFFFFzł
¥Eww... it stinks... please Marialisa... I can't breathe this stuff... it stinks too much... I will die...¥, 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ was begging Marialisa to let him go, but all she did was laughing at him and saying that he can't die just because of the smell of her farts, $Don't worry, you can't die from my farts, it's just gonna stink really bad~I hope you're ready for some more, I'm really gassy~hohoho~hehehe~~~$
₹BBBPPPBBBRRRTTTSSSFFF₹
The smell was so bad that 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ was feeling like his nose was melting, turning into a smelly liquid, becoming one with Marialisa's hot flatulent gases, he was feeling like that rancid eggy vegetable stench was the only the thing he could breathe, and he definitely wasn't wrong about it! 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́'s nose, face and the hair on his head were all becoming smelly, there was no way he could breathe fresh air since the horrible smell of Marialisa's ass gas was occupying a large area, slowly stinking up her whole bedroom. 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ had to accept how gassy Marialisa is, and how he's gonna breathe nothing but her smelly farts for the next three hours, every breath, sniff, whiff and inhalation will be smelly, no fresh air, he was struggling to accept that, but the other choice was not breathing at all, which is impossible to consciously choose that option. The smell of her farts was burning his nostrils' hair, he felt like his lungs were rotting, it was unbearable, but he had to go through this smelly torment, because he signed that contract, and so he had no choice but to try his best to endure such a potent stench that was making his eyes water. $Enjoy the smell~nnnnnggggghhhhh.....$
₽PPBBBRRRTTTSSSFFFBBBPP₽
The smell was frying 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́'s brain and nose, he strongly wished he could take even a short breath of fresh air, away from that rancid, annoying, irritating stench that was not supposed to be breathed in like that, because it really stinks, even 10 seconds of fresh air would had been enough of a break for him, but Marialisa had a different opinion, and she was determined to make 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ smell as many of her farts as possible for three hours, no matter how bad they smelled. Well, actually, for Marialisa, the worst her farts smelled, the more amusing and entertaining the face-farting was. She found 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́'s reactions funny. How he gagged, how awkwardly he moved his legs, trying to endure the smell of putrefaction that came through her stomach and was released through her anus, it was obvious he was struggling and suffering, and that's why Marialisa was having so much fun, she was proud of how bad her farts smelled, and hearing 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ gag was causing her to have a maniacal laughter that was creeping 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ out. $Ooohhh... I feel like this next one is gonna stink really badly~nngghh..⁓$
₿B̀B́P̀ṔT̀T́S̀ŚF̀F́P̀ṔB̀₿
¥EWW MARIALISA THIS ONE SMELLS CORRUPTED!!! GET OFF FROM ME!!! I'M GONNA DIE!!!¥, 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ was complaining very loudly and trying to break free from under Marialisa's ass, at this point he didn't even care about the legal troubles anymore, he just wanted to escape that horrifying stench that Marialise just blasted into his nostrils. $HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!$, Marialisa was laughing maniacally, $Nope, your nose is gonna stay on my ass until the three hours have passed~~~$
After those three hours were over, 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ was feeling nauseated and disgusted, he couldn't get rid of that smell from his nose and his memories, he kept gagging and his eyes were still watering a little bit. His nose, face and hair were smelly, and his t-shirt was a little bit smelly too, as Marialisa's farts impacted a large area. Her whole bedroom stunk, at that point. $You have been a good boy, you respected the contract and survived my gas~I bet it stunk to be under there~hehehe~$
¥I'll be careful before accepting contracts, conditions and terms of service next time. I thought I was gonna die... eww... uuuhhh... can we open the windows? Your room seriously stinks really bad!¥, 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ said.
$Okay! Let's go to the living room so you can finally breathe fresh air!$, Marialisa suggested, and 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ agreed. They both went to the living room.
¥Hey Marialisa! Wanna come to my house next week! I can show you some tricks with my skateboard!¥, 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́ suggested.
$Okay... hey 0̲̀∞̫̂0̲́, I don't want to creep you out, but I'm not Marialisa$
[ERROR]
¥W-what? What are you talking about? Is this some sort of creepy joke?¥
[MISTÂK̴̂Ê̴̷]
$I'm not Marialisa... I'm a nobody... I'm just a...$, she said, starting to cry.
$[FᷫAͣIͥLᷝUͧRͬEͤ]$