"DON'T MAKE ME ANGRY!", I said, hitting a younger person (I'm 30, he's like... 25) until he bleeds. They called the ambulance, but the police did nothing, as he voluntarily entered the fight. Everyone was acclaiming, I felt so good knowing the true power of my fists.
"ANYONE ELSE?", I shouted. Nobody wanted to fight me, as they knew I was really strong!
*Text Message*
Oh, look, my sister invited me to her house, I will really look forward to it, she usually cooks amazing foods and, after a fight, her nachos are delicious! It will be such an amazing dinner. I drive to her house, happily, and enter.
My sister soon handcuffs me. I'm confused.
"I heard you hit a person", she said.
"Yes, I do it all the time", "That's not good! It's time for you to get punished!", "Please...", "You'll be smelling my daughter's farts!", "WHAT?!"
"YES!!! You're going to cry a lot, hehehe...", said Melissa.
Melissa is a 15 years old girl. She always had super stinky farts I've never been able to tolerate. Everytime she farts I have to go to another room, with tears falling from my eyes, and now I'm forced to smell them. NOOO!!!
My sister places a belt around my neck.
"What are you going to do?", I ask. I'm legit scared.
My niece takes down her pants. I can see her panties, how embarassing. My sister places the belt between my neck and Melissa's waist. My nose is basically in her ass. My sister closes the belt very tight, and now I can't move at all. My nose is forced to stay there, and I can't move it.
"Do what you want with him, he's totally yours!", my sister said.
"OH YES! I'VE ALWAYS DREAMED OF FARTING ON SOMEONE'S FACE! THANK YOU MOM!", said Melissa.
"You're welcome, sweety"
"I have to fart, hehehe... it's gonna stink... a lot"
PBBBRRRFFFTTT
"*sniff*"
OH MY... IT STINKS SO MUCH I CAN'T DESCRIBE IT! I CAN'T TOLERATE IT, IT STIIINKS!!!
"GYAAAAAA!!!!!!"
I scream in pain, this is the most awful, rotten, pungent, noxious fart I've ever smelled. Words can't properly describe how much it stinks. And to make it worse, Melissa was giggling.
"Hehehe... it stinks... oh yeah it stinks so much... hehehe", she was singing. How annoying.
PBBBFFFRRRTTT
"*sniff* PUUUAAAAAAHHHHHH!!! PUUU PUUU PUUUUUU!!!!! *sniff* GYAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!"
I can't take it, the smell is so strong and putrid.. "*sniff* GYUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!". I'm suffering so much, I can't breathe this toxic gas, I'll die! I have to find a solution soon, but how? I can't move at all!
"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA IT'S SO FUNNY!!! A COUPLE OF FARTS FROM A TEENAGER GIRL BRINGING A GROWN MAN TO TEARS! BWAHAHAHA IT'S RIDICULOUS! GROW UP BABY! TAKE THIS AND SHUT UP!"
PBBBFFFRRRTTT
"*sniff* UUUUUUAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!! AAAUUU AAAUUU AAAUUU!!! *sniff* PUU PUU PUU PUU!!! *sniff* GYUUUAAAAAAHHH!!!"
"ARE MY FARTS TOO STINKY FOR YOUR LITTLE BABY NOSE? HAHAHA!!!"
BBBFFFPPPRRRTTT
"Please, let me go, I will never hit anyone again, *sniff* GYAAAAAAAAA PAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!", I said, hoping she would release me. You can't understand how much it stinks, it feels like I'm breathing... "*sniff* QUAAAAAAAAA!!!!!! AAAPPUUUUUU PUUU PUUU PUUU PUUU *sniff* PUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!" I don't know... the stinkiest cheese ever, mixed with the stinkiest girl sock ever, mixed with... "*sniff* GYAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUU PUUUUUU EEEEEEWWWWWW BLEEEEEEGH *sniff* PUUUUUU AUUUUUU AAAUUUUUUUUU AAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUU!" ......mixed with five months old rotten eggs and rotten cabbage, all of this right inside my nose. It's devastating, an assault to my nostrils.
"NO! I'm having so much fun, I LOVE seeing you squirming from the stench! Hehehe..."
BBBFFFPPPRRRSSSTTT
"*sniff* GYIIIUUUUUUAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE MELISSA, PLEASE LET ME... *sniff* ABUUUUUUAAAAAAAAA AUUUU AUUUU AUUUU *sniff* BAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!! *sniff* BUUUUUUUUU!!! *sniff* DUUUUUUH *sniff* FEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWW *sniff* GAAAAAAAAA!!!!!! *sniff* NUUUUUUUUU!!!!!! *sniff* PUU PUUU PUUUU PUUUU!!!!!! MELISSA PLEASE LET ME GO!!! I CAN'T BREATHE!!! *sniff* IIIIIIAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!! *sniff* IIIHHH IIIHHH IHHH!!!"
It's absolutely rancid, it's impossible to tolerate this kind of stench, and you'll never get used to it, forget it! It's like breathing in tear gas, but an extremely stinky one.
Melissa was singing again. I feel so humiliated.
"YEAH YEAH YEAH, MY UNCLE CAN'T STAND MY FARTS, HE'S A WEAK OLD ASS, I'LL TORTURE HIM WITH STINK BOMBS, UNTIL HE CAN'T BREATHE ANYMORE, YEAH YEAH YEAH, HERE'S ANOTHER STINK BOMB..."
TTTSSSRRRPPPFFFBBB
"*sniff* BGAAAAAA!!!!!! HAVE MERCY ON ME! PLEASE! *sniff* BLEEEEEEHHH!!! *sniff* BNUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!! *sniff* BZAAAUUUUUU!!! *sniff* BLEEEHHH!!!"
How can I describe it? Whenever she farts, I feel a hot and incredibly fetid wind entering my nose, "*sniff* PUUUAAAAAAUUUUUUUUU PUUU PUUU PUUU PUUU!!!" and I can't do anything to prevent it, I'm totally helpless, since I can't move my nose because of the tight belt and handcuffs... *sniff* GYAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!". Everytime I breathe I feel like I'm in hell, it's putrid, rancid, rotten, decayed, spoiled, pungent, nauseating, vomit-inducing... "*sniff* GYAAAUUUAIUUU PEEEEEEWWW BLEEEEEEEEHHH!!!" I may end all adjectives.
"Good news for me! I'm never going to end this torture, you're gonna smell my farts forever!!! EHEHEHEH..."
PPPFFFFTTTTTRRRRRRSSSSSSSBBB
"*sniff* FUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!! *sniff* GYAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!! *sniff* MNNNGGG PEEEEEEWWW PUUUUUU *sniff* BLEEEEEEHHHHHH AUUU *sniff* AAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUU AAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!"
"Well uncle, you have to accept the fact that your pathetic nose is going to be stink-bombed every single day for many years to come. It's not hard to understand. Smell this one, you're going to be insane very soon, it's gonna stiiink!!! Good luck breathing in this one, hahaha"
PSSSSSSFFFFFFTTT
"*sniff* GYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"Ohhh... it was... silent but deadly! Hehehe *giggles*"
The other ones were deadly enough, but this one... this one takes your soul away, trust me... "*sniff* GYAAAAAAAAAPUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU PUUU PUUU PUUU BLEEEEEEHHH PEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!! *sniff* UUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *sniff* AAAAAAUUUUUU!!!!!!". I'm going to desperate very soon, this gas is totally raunchy, I can't take it...
"Don't worry, little crybaby, this gas is 100% natural so it won't harm you, it's totally safe, it just stinks like a chemical weapon hehehe..."
PBBBFFFRRRSSSTTT
"*sniff* GYUUUUUUAAAAAAAAA MELISSA I'VE LEARNED MY LESSON PLEASE LET ME GO!!! *sniff* PUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA MY EYES ARE BURNING!!! *sniff* PUUUUUU PUUUUUU PUUUUUU PUUUUUU BLEEEEEEHHH!!!"
"It's going to be a very stinky year... for you! Hahaha!!!"
PPPBBBPPPFFFRRRSSSTTT
"*sniff* GYUUUUUUAAAAAAAAA Only a year? Wheew *sniff* PUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!"
"Yes, but it's going to be all day, every day, and trust me, it's gonna be a pure torture for your sense of smell! Hahaha!"
PPPFFFSSSTTT
"*sniff* NOOOOOOOOO UUUAAAAAAHHH!!!" *sniff* PUUUKHAAAAAA PLEASE NO! I WILL DO ANYTHING! *sniff* GYAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!"
"Nope, you're going to be gassed anyway. Hehehe..."
PFFFTTTSSSFFFTTT
"*sniff* UUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!! PLEASE MELISSA I BEG YOU, YOU ARE A GODDESS PLEASE IT STINKS SO BAD HERE!!! *sniff* GYAAAAAA PUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!! PLEASE LET ME GO!!! HAVE MERCY!!! *sniff* GRRRYUUUAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAA"
Oh this girl's farts sure do stink. Breathing them is a cruel torture and with this belt there is no escape from these lethal fumes... "*sniff* GYAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!"
"You have no idea how fun it is to watch you getting desperate and hopeless because of my toxic stinky toots! It's fun because you are so old and you're crying like a baby because of what? Because of my stinky farts?! That's fun! I feel so powerful! I'm so happy that I will do this to you all day long, every single day. I'll give you no break from this game! Hehehe..."
PFFFSSSTTT
I surrender to suffering, there is no way I can handle this unbearable stench.
"*sniff* GYAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!"
"One whiff of my farts is enough to bring a grown man to tears... how funny! Hahaha! They smell sooo bad, hehehe.."
PPPBBBFFFRRRSSSTTT
"*sniff* PUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!! MELISSA PLEASE DON'T GAS ME EVERYDAY, IT REEKS DOWN HERE! *crying* I WANT TO GO HOME *crying* *sniff* GIUUUPUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!"
"You won't be going anywhere, you're staying under my butt for this year!!! Enjoy my natural stink bombs! Do they stink too much for your cute little nose? Hahaha"
PPPBBBRRRSSSTTT
"*sniff* EEEEEEGGGHHH!!! KKKPUUUUUU!!! *sniff* PUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!! HAVE MERCY!!!!!!"
"But... I'm having so much fun! Seeing you not being able to stand the smell of my farts is so cool! They are super stinky, and that's hilarious!"
PPPBBBRRRSSSTTT
"*sniff* GYAAAAAAAAAHHH!!! *crying* THIS IS NOT FUNNY AT ALL!!! *sniff* PUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!"
"Oh, yes, it is indeed. Just think about how many people I can bring to desperation just like I'm doing with you! If they do something wrong, they will learn their lesson! Duh..."
PPPFFFSSSTTT
"*sniff* PUUUUUUUUU GYAAAAAAH!!! PLEASE MELISSA YOU ARE SO BEAUTIFUL AND KIND, DON'T BE NAUGHTY *sniff* AKKKPUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!! *crying* MELISSA PLEASE LET ME GO I'M DYING FROM THIS TERRIBLE STINK *sniff* PUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!"
She was singing again. Such an annoying little girl.
"HAHAHAHA!!! YOU CAN'T STAND MY FARTS, BE READY TO BE GASSED, THIS TORTURE IS FOR YOU, YOU CAN'T GO AWAY... NANANANANA..."
PPPBBBFFFRRRSSSTTT
"*sniff* PUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! I WILL DO YOUR HOMEWORK EVERYDAY IF YOU LET ME GO! *sniff* GYAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!"
"I don't need it, I prefer stinking up your nose with my putrid farts... hehehe..."
PFFFBBBFFFRRRSSSTTT
"*sniff* UUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! PUUU PUUU PUUU!!! *sniff* PUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!"
"I love this game! And this is just the beginning! We're going to have fun together, me, you, my butt and your nose... eheheh"
I can't take it, I'm going to suffer the most painful torture a human nose can ever experience, and this is only the beginning. I'd rather die, really.