"I have to tell you something", I asked Catherine, nervously.
"Tell me!", she said, smiling.
"Well, I like to smell my own farts", I admitted.
"That's normal, haha!", she said, smiling even more.
"I wonder what other people's farts smell like", I said.
"I understand", she said.
Damn, that's not what I wanted her to say.
"What do your farts smell like?", I asked.
"Like... I don't know, farts?", she said.
"I'd like to smell one, hahaha", I said, very nervously.
"Okay, when I have one I'll fart on your face, but, stay calm, you look very nervous!", she said, worried.
"It's okay!", I said.
Wow, sure she is open-minded, I thought she were going to call me mentally insane or something like that, I wouldn't have been able to handle an insult. People still don't consider liking farts as a good thing, but, somehow, Catherine is different from the rest.
"So, have you heard about the new space exploration game? It looks so cool!", she said.
"No, I haven't. Please tell me more about that!"
"I don't remember the name but it looks awesome! You can go anywhere you want!"
"You don't consider me weird, right?"
"Why should I?"
"Because of earlier"
"No, don't worry, it's just a fun game" (smiles)
"Okay, thank you!"
"You're welcome"
I was going to smell her fart today, hopefully. What an emotion.
"I have a fart, quick, put your nose here!", she said.
I put my nose near her butt, she farted and I smelled it. It smelled like nothing. Absolutely nothing. I was so disappointed. i was so sad, and it was obvious.
"Are you sad about something?", she asked.
"No, it's okay"
"Is it because you think I think you're weird? It's not like that! I promise!"
"It's not because of that. Do you want to know the truth?"
"Yes, please"
"It's because your fart doesn't smell. I have thought about this for years, and all I got was nothing".
She stopped smiling and hugged me.
"I'm sorry, but it's not my fault"
"Don't worry, I know it's not your fault. Do you know any girl who has stinky farts?"
"No, I'm very sorry"
"I love you"
"I love you, too"
We hugged each other for a long time, many minutes, and we both felt a lot better.
"Let's forget what happened, please", I said.
"You don't want to smell my farts anymore?", she asked.
"There's nothing to smell, honestly"
"Okay, do you want to do something else?"
"Since I already told you something embarrassing, yes, please... uh"
"What?"
"Caress my head, I like it"
"Okay"
She started doing that and oh... that felt so good! It was so relaxing! Suddenly my mind forgot about all the embarrassment and pain I've felt before, and I started to smile and feel calm.
*PRRRTTT*
Suddenly, she farted, and all those recent memories came back to my mind.
"I'm sorry, hehe!", she said, giggling.
I tried to smell it but, there was nothing to smell.
She kept playing with my hair and caressing my head, but after that fart, I was too embarrassed to relax again. I felt uncomfortable. But I admit it still feels nice to have someone touch you in such a lovely way.
*PFFFRRRTTT*
She farted again. She giggled. I felt loved and anxious (about her judgement) at the same time, it was such a bittersweet feeling I can't describe properly because I'm not a professional writer who writes entire books of detailed descriptions about something but, I didn't know what I should have felt.
"Promise me you won't judge me for what I've told you earlier", I requested
"Of course I won't! I'm your friend, am I not?"
"Sure, but, I'm not feeling very comfortable"
"Why?"
"You are farting and reminding me about earlier"
"I'm sorry, I won't do that anymore, I thought you liked it"
"Thank you"
Now I can relax and be happy. She rubbed the back of my neck and it felt so good. It's so good to be happy, and everyone should be. I'm asking myself if a girl that makes very stinky farts is real or just my imagination. Maybe it's rare, but she does exist! I prefer not to know, I'm afraid of people's judgement. You can't be yourself in this society. Just follow what other people are doing, it's the best way not to be judged. Even caressing is not that accepted, but I prefer to be judged because of this rather than because I like farts. I don't want to talk about farts anymore. I've made this mistake once, and never again. I'm lucky she doesn't consider me crazy. Yes, being touched feels good, but I still have a headache for what happened earlier. I hope she doesn't notice my discomfort, she usually does. I don't know how she's able to tell if I'm happy or sad, she has some sort of power.
"Please, don't tell anyone about what happened today", I said.
"You mean, the farts or the cuddles?"
"BOTH!"
"Don't worry, they are our little secrets!", she said, hugging me tight.
"If you don't mind, I want to talk", I said
"Okay, tell me anything, I'm here for you"
"I really want to smell a very stinky fart from a girl, what should I do?"
"Publish something on the web!"
"It would be far too embarassing, I'm afraid my dream will never come true", (I'm about to cry)
She hugs me and says:"Don't worry, what about I search for a girl like you want, who also doesn't judge?"
"Absolutely not! This is going to be a secret between you and me, and only us! Okay?"
"Okay, but my farts never stink"
"I give up, I don't even want that anymore, I know I've already lost. Just rub my shoulders and I'll be fine"
She touched my shoulders. I was feeling better, but far from being fine. My dream will never come true, it's so hard to find the right girl, and when you find her, she will think you are crazy, that's the truth. The things I want will only happen within my mind. She is very nice, but she can't help me. But suddenly, I feel good. She's been touching me for a long time now and I feel so peaceful. It doesn't matter if THAT dream doesn't come true, I have plenty of other wishes to fulfill. I feel so lively and ready to do so many things.
"Thank you so much. It feels wonderful, and now I'm so happy. I want to live my life fully, and even though that dream will never happen in real life, there are so many other things I want to do, for example travelling around the world and learn. I realized that even though there is one thing you don't get, you shouldn't be sad about it. There are at least ten other things you want and can easily get, so I shouldn't worry. I'm so happy, and I'm glad you are my friend. We'll be friends forever, and your kindness matters much more than that stupid dream of mine. Thank you", I said.
"You're welcome, and I'm glad you've learned something from my little massage (smiles). You are right, there are some things you can't have, but that doesn't mean your life is bad! And if you're ever feeling sad again, come at my house and I'll hug and cuddle with you so much you'll totally forget what sadness feels like" (she smiles and hugs me)